all the time
taken the energy
spent searching the perfect
sapling severed its shaft
balanced and smooth
molded to your hand

an expertly
whittled tip
too fine
and it might be
missed too fat
the emphasis inexact

oh, the journey
for the medium
too much wind
in the Mohave
to many bones
the Sahara

all the beaches
scoured the timing
calculated tool at the
ready the sun
low on the horizon

and the ominous sound
of hubris corrected rising
from the bottom of the ocean

all the way
across the line
scars the sand naked
and watching the folly
on this side awaiting
the only answer

that side the maker
bleeding then carving
the line then
crying then
drawing again on
and on to
make it last

all to contain
a boundaryless
country an orderless
universe an unwalled garden
fecund, fertile, free

--natalie patrice © 2009

more lol celebs!

ok y'all know i never met a meme i didn't like(except perhaps The Game) so here for your meme-loving pleasure i present:

The point of the game is to type "[your name] needs" on Google. The top ten results get posted. Some are quite amusing, others sadly true. Enjoy and TAG you are it.

1. Natalie needs a nightie
2. Natalie needs Newcastle
3. Natalie needs your support
4. Natalie needs to go
5. Natalie needs your vote!
6. Natalie needs your prayers and support
7. Natalie needs insulin injections twice a day
8. Natalie needs your prayers and good thoughts
9. Natalie needs to pay for a clock-radio
10. Natalie needs to loosen up

i have to say this is fucking HILARIOUS! but i'm not gonna discourage you from sending your prayers and support!

I loose my shit everytime i watch this....which is often.

I've a poem wanting to be born about the City (NY), weaving in the events of the last few days. I'm pregnant with words really. so full to the brink with inspiration and want and satisfaction. first, notes for posterity: entrance serendipity, the smell of Oldskool, the massive blowout, the burn and press, Shango's strength. Dancing for the King. TopTop's hands and at my throat laughing, taunting, tremors. Tantric fisting. 3+ hour beat down. the one that got away.

How will I ever be able to think of anything else? I must, there are a million details to manage that don't have anything to do with breaking the skin. I'm a starved bitch, greedy when finally there's plenty. It can never be enough. Not true really, I'm completely full up. There have been nearly 3 years since the last, surely I'd survive another. but does this mean that i won't have to? how to nurture this buddy thing so it blooms? Does Hallmark make cards that say "that was the best beat-down of my life" or "Tops like you are one in a million. Thanks for not being nice." If they don't, somebody should.

Said straight Desire, was amazing. It's like somebody asked me what and who turns me on and served it up, on a six-hour long platter with treats and surprises i hadn't even known to fantasize about but which will now hijack my mind at every idle moment. I'm not much of a sleeper but I slept like a dead rock this morning. And had the most exquiste dreams. of course there's all the concern for being strange and that alas is my constant companion. There's no denying it I'm odd and curious and it's my favorite thing about myself. except when i wish i had the wallflower gene, which absolutely completely skipped me. Instead when I'm nervous i'm much more likely to draw a crowd. Good thing i don't take myself too seriously.

Serendipity, Synchronicity, and Flow? it's no small thing that both this inspiring event and the anthology i've edited are named Desire. Especially given the movement in that area. More on that another time. Now I'm falling asleep at the laptop and must sleep to dream.

I love you,
me

I've watched it three times and it doesn't get old.

I'm always the last to know... I just discovered The Knife and I'm a changed womon.

An Open Letter to Certain White Women Who Are Threatening to Withhold Support from Obama in November 2008

Your Whiteness is Showing

By TIM WISE
This is an open letter to those white women who, despite their proclamations of progressivism, and supposedly because of their commitment to feminism, are threatening to withhold support from Barack Obama in November. You know who you are.


I know that it's probably a bad time for this. Your disappointment at
the electoral defeat of Senator Hillary Clinton is fresh, the sting is new, and the anger that animates many of you - who rightly point out that the media was often sexist in its treatment of the Senator - is raw, pure and justified.

That said, and despite the awkward timing, I need to ask you a few questions, and I hope you will take them in the spirit of solidarity with which they are genuinely intended. But before the questions, a statement if you don't mind, or indeed, even if (as I suspect), you will mind it quite a bit.
First, for those of you threatening to actually vote for John McCain and to oppose Senator Obama, or to stay home in November and thereby increase the likelihood of McCain winning and Obama losing (despite the fact that the latter's policy platform is virtually identical to Clinton's while the former's clearly is not), all the while claiming to be standing up for women...

For those threatening to vote for John McCain or to stay home and increase the odds of his winning (despite the fact that he once called his wife the c-word in public and is a staunch opponent of reproductive freedom and gender equity initiatives, such as comparable worth legislation), all the while claiming to be standing up for women...

For those threatening to vote for John McCain or to stay home and help ensure Barack Obama's defeat, as a way to protest what you call Obama's sexism (examples of which you seem to have difficulty coming up with), all the while claiming to be standing up for women... Your whiteness is showing.

When I say your whiteness is showing this is what I mean: You claim that your opposition to Obama is an act of gender solidarity, in that women (and their male allies) need to stand up for women in the face of the sexist mistreatment of Clinton by the press. On this latter point--the one about the importance of standing up to the media for its often venal misogyny--you couldn't be more correct. As the father of two young girls who will have to contend with the poison of patriarchy all their lives, or at least until such time as that system of oppression is eradicated, I will be the first to join the boycott of, or demonstration on, whatever media outlet you choose to make that point. But on the first part of the above equation - the part where you insist voting against Obama is about gender solidarity - you are, for lack of a better way to put it, completely full of crap. And what's worse is that at some level I suspect you know it. Voting against Senator Obama is not about gender
solidarity. It is an act of white racial bonding, and it is grotesque.

If it were gender solidarity you sought, you would by definition join with your black and brown sisters come November, and do what you know good and well they are going to do, in overwhelming numbers, which is vote for Barack Obama. But no. You are threatening to vote not like other women - you know, the ones who aren't white like you and most of your friends - but rather, like white men!

Needless to say it is high irony, bordering on the outright farcical, to believe that electorally bonding with white men, so as to elect McCain, is a rational strategy for promoting feminism and challenging patriarchy. You are not thinking and acting as women, but as white people. So here's the first question: What the hell is that about? And you wonder why women of color have, for so long, thought (by and large) that white so-called feminists were phony as hell? Sister please... Your threats are not about standing up for women. They are only about standing up for the feelings of white women, and more to the point, the aspirations of one white woman. So don't kid yourself. If you wanted to make a statement about the importance of supporting a woman, you wouldn't need to vote for John McCain, or stay home, thereby producing the same likely result--a defeat for Obama.

You could always have said you were going to go out and vote for Cynthia McKinney. After all, she is a woman, running with the Green Party, and she's progressive, and she's a feminist. But that isn't your threat is it? No. You're not threatening to vote for the woman, or even the feminist woman. Rather, you are threatening to vote for the white man, and to reject not only the black man who you feel stole Clinton's birthright, but even the black woman in the race. And I wonder why? Could it be...? See, I told you your whiteness was showing.

And now for a third question, and this is the biggie, so please take your time with it: How is it that you have managed to hold your nose all these years, just like a lot of us on the left, and vote for Democrats who we knew were horribly inadequate - Kerry, Gore, Clinton, Dukakis, right on down the uninspiring line - and yet, apparently can't bring yourself to vote for Barack Obama? A man who, for all of his shortcomings (and there are several, as with all candidates put up by either of the two major corporate parties) is surely more progressive than any of those just mentioned. And how are we to understand that refusal - this sudden line in the proverbial sand - other than as a racist slap at a black man? You will vote for white men year after year after year - and are threatening to vote for another one just to make a point - but can't bring yourself to vote for a black man, whose political views come much closer to your own, in all likelihood, than do the views of any of the wh
ite men you've supported before. How, other than as an act of racism, or perhaps as evidence of political insanity, is one to interpret such a thing?

See, black folks would have sucked it up, like they've had to do forever, and voted for Clinton had it come down to that. Indeed, they were on board the Hillary train early on, convinced that Obama had no chance to win and hoping for change, any change, from the reactionary agenda that has been so prevalent for so long in this culture. They would have supported the white woman - hell, for many black folks, before Obama showed his mettle they were downright excited to do so - but you won't support the black man. And yet you have the audacity to insist that it is you who are the most loyal constituency of the Democratic Party, and the one before whom Party leaders should bow down, and whose feet must be kissed? Your whiteness is showing.


Look, I couldn't care less about the Party personally. I left the Democrats twenty years ago when they told me that my activism in the Central America solidarity and South African anti-apartheid movements made me a security risk, and that I wouldn't be able to get clearance to be in some parade with Governor Dukakis. Yeah, seriously. But for you to act as though you are the indispensible voters, the most important, the ones whose views should be pandered to, whose every whim should be the basis for Party policy, is not only absurd, it is also racist in that it, (a) ignores and treats as irrelevant the much more loyal constituency of black folks, without whom no Democrat would have won anything in the past twenty years (and indeed the racial gap favoring the Democrats among blacks is about six times larger than the gender gap favoring them among white women, relative to white men); and (b) demonstrates the mentality of entitlement and superiority that has been long ingrained in us a
s white folks - so that we believe we have the right to dictate the terms of political engagement, and to determine the outcome, and to get our way, simply because for so long we have done just that.

But that day is done, whether you like it or not, and you are now left with two, and only two choices, so consider them carefully: the first is to stand now in solidarity with your black brothers and sisters and welcome the new day, and help to push it in a truly progressive and feminist and antiracist direction, while the second is to team up with white men to try and block the new day from dawning.

Feel free to choose the latter. But if you do, please don't insult your own intelligence, or ours, by insisting that you've done so as a radical political act.
------------------------------

Way to get yo'self born today!!! The world would be a bleak loveless hell withoutcha.


food porn for you!

Clyde has a lot of friends. A great mob of them and if there's anything he lacks in friends it's more than made up for by the mass of family he's got. Make's me feel like a friendless orphan sometimes. Not that i don't have a motley crew of the most fabulous people in the ommiverse to call my friends but i relate to them much differently than he does. They call all hours of the day and night. They lean on him for advice and get him into ridiculous pickles. When we first got together i tried to win them over but that was futile as, by and large, they are not a trusting lot though i've managed to be friendly with a few of the more important of the tribe. At this point they don't much affect my life except to the extent that they affect Clyde's life, which, upon reflection, is a great lot.

In particular there is the issue of the amount of time they require. One of the things that really works best about my relationship with Clyde is that he gives me a wide berth. We love spending time together and I love spending time alone. I can usually got about a week before I need massive amounts of Natalie time, about 3 or 4 days usually suffices. We've gotten into this rhythm where we spend every minute we can together for a week or so and then he spends 5 or 6 days between his friend and families' places. Every now and again there will be a power struggle when his friends/family want him when it's my time but i usually win because while they cook his favorite foods like crab, i have an unlimited supply of ass. ass trumps crab.

Lately I've been feeling a little needier. The weather's nice I want to go out and play with the boy without having to consult his social calendar. Unfortunately my whining coincides with his birthday month (he'll be 40 on the 13th) which is apparently akin to a national holiday to those folks. So i can go hang out with folks i'm passibly cordial with to be with him or i can wait til it's my time again. Needless to say I've been waiting.

It's been making me restless and I finally figured out why. I have a running joke with him about "that bitch", a fictious other woman who gets blamed for all kinds of random shit and mercilessly picked on for no good reason. Last night when i was picking on her again we were laughing and realized that his friends ARE the other woman. That crush of friends and family are needy, whiny, full of drama, and trying to steal my man.

Seeing them that way takes a fair amount of the significance out of my neediness.


In other news, April 28 was our 2 year anniversary and you'll never believe what I did!! I cooked an amazing dinner of lamb rib chops, spring pea and rosemary risotto, and roasted asparagus and paired it with an amazing (read: expensive) vintage Merlot. I really put my foot in it!! He declared it the best meal he'd ever eaten. And I have to say that I surprised myself. The lamb was perfectly medium and the risotto wasn't burned!! I got the recipe from Rachael Ray's magazine. Gawd bless Rachael Ray!!

There's so much going on, Clyde and I are planning to live in Zimbabwe for a few months, work is intense, my relationship with my sister has gone to a new level. I've got so much to write about and not enough time at present. Soon though, soon.

i love you,
me

Created by OnePlusYou

lovely and hilarious

I'm so going to hell for LMAO at this. (it's not true by the way) Thank gawd for The Onion.

Sara Bareilles' Little Voice is a brilliant and delicious album. Started out that I couldn't get "Love Song" out of my mind. Then I'd gottten stuck on "Vegas" on endless repeat. Now it feels like "One Sweet Love" is living my life. There isn't a bad song in the lot.  Don't take my word for it



One Sweet Love

Just about the time the shadows call
I undress my mind and dare you to follow
Paint a portrait of my mystery
Only close my eyes and you are here with me
A nameless face to think I see
To sit and watch the waves with me till they're gone
A heart I'd swear I'd recognize is made out of
My own devices....
Could I be wrong?

[CHORUS]
The time that I've taken
I pray is not wasted
Have I already tasted my piece of one sweet love?

Sleepless nights you creep inside of me
Paint your shadows on the breath that we share
You take more than just my sanity
You take my reason not to care.
No ordinary wings I'll need
The sky itself will carry me back to you
The things I dream that I can do I'll open up
The moon for you
Just come down soon

[CHORUS]
The time that I've taken
I pray is not wasted
Have I already tasted my piece of one sweet love?
Ready and waiting for a heart worth the breaking
But I'd settle for an honest mistake in the name of
One sweet love.

Savor the sorrow to soften the pain sip on
The southern rain
As I do, I don't look don't touch don't do anything
But hope that there is a you.

The earth that is the space between,
I'd banish it from under me...to get to you.
Your unexpected love provides my solitary's
Suicide...oh I wish I knew

[CHORUS]
The time that I've taken
I pray is not wasted
Have I already tasted my piece of one sweet love?
Ready and waiting for a heart worth the breaking
But I'd settle for an honest mistake in the name of
One sweet love.

Europeanview on “A more perfect Union”

very interesting blog post about the Obama race speech from a guy in England that references other international media coverage.

http://www.wset.com/news/stories/0308/504814_video.html?ref=newsstory

My mother is the Executive Director of this school and my brother and his son are featured in this video. Saving this school is a family affair. I'm building a website to help them raise money to keep the school open and viable.